Fabricating Awareness

Once upon a summer day in a village in India, Ramesh had planned to go out for ‘some adventure’ with his two best friends Vijay and Anuj. The adventure that he had been so excited over was a walk to a hill behind his school in the afternoon, later they would eat some snacks over there and then plan to walk further (probably).

The hill which was going to be the subject of the proposed ‘adventure’ was behind the school where these boys attend, where they studied in the sixth grade. It is the beginning of adolescence for many, beginning of the shedding of childishness or is it?!

Ramesh had known Vijay and Anuj since 2^nd grade. They were the only ones in their class. That’s it. Nobody other than them and the teacher in the class. In all the four years they had been together, they had invented a new game called “here and there” (wherein two poles were required which had enough distance between them; one person would be playing as a ‘hunter’ and the others would be the ‘beasts’ and the two poles would be considered as the safety points where each has the capacity to hold only one safe; the funny part is that these two beasts don’t like each other and so each would try to hijack the other’s pole, when that happens the former beast has to run to the other pole while trying to not get caught by the hunter), played indoor cricket in their classrooms with a sharpener as the ball and a notebook as the bat ( wherein Anuj would come out as the top scorer and every time he scored a century he would remove his spectacles and smile at the ceiling) and obviously planned ‘adventures’ as they called it.

Anuj was the better athlete among the three, also good at studies and competitive (very much). Vijay was the funny guy, had good handwriting, and knew Ramesh since before and a bit round at the waist (just a bit).Ramesh was the tallest one, also competitive, a crybaby (whenever he lost to Anuj) and good at oration.

Before the walk to the hill the bunch had gathered at Ramesh’s place. Vijay had brought an elder boy with him who was supposed to keep an eye over them, which in this context means “not let wander much”. This teenage boy’s name was something else actually but due to lack of proper recollection of his name, Ramesh referred to him as ‘Charlie’, all the time of their short acquaintance.

As they left towards the hill, walking towards it from Ramesh’s home would fit approximately two football fields; it was straight road to the school and the hill behind it. The passersby felt that it was bit weird for three boys marching with a grin while the one behind them was grumbling as he held onto a huge mattress, that would later be spread for the three of them to sit on the hill.

So the boys walked up the hill, spread the mattress while the sun was above them and the ground was bit warm with grass being peach green which had grown unequally all over the hill, ate their snacks drank the water they had brought and started packing up.

Ramesh wanted to walk further, go down the hill and walk ahead where there lay three small hills and just walk. He suggested this to the others which they rejected. The outright rejection came from ‘Charlie’ who was fed up and said that there were snakes and summer beasts ahead which probably influenced the other two’s decision. Ramesh was quite stubborn and said that he would still go alone. The rest agreed and before they left Ramesh told them to tell his mother that he would be back in an hour (while he did not have a watch with him the whole time). Ramesh stood on top watching as the others made their way back. He turned and looked at the hills that lie ahead of him and felt excitement rush to him as this would be his own experience, it would be solely be his view and his thoughts. At the same time he was scared that he wouldn’t want to return home since he wanted to keep that feeling inside him.

He took a step ahead and then another. With each step he felt that he was breathing. He found himself confused. He thought it was a bit odd that he’d feel like this, he had had many experience so far and many with his friends and his family, but as he walked alone he had never felt this feeling before. He looked at the ground ahead of him, the grass going dry on the black soil which would soon turn barren due to drought and then looked behind, and he did not see his footsteps at which he smiled.

Ramesh was at the third and last hill and came to the tree which had grown on top of it. It did not provide much shed but still he sat below it, resting on the trunk. He did not find the walk tiring at all but the flood of emotions which quite had exhausted him with wonder still lingering. He sat on the warm ground even though his mom would get a ‘bit’ angry at him for getting his shorts dirty. He held a fist of soil up and let it fall from his hand. He watched closely. He wondered how many people had treaded on this path before him. He wondered what he would be doing the next year, would he still be here or somewhere else. He wondered what he would be thinking a day before his 20^th birthday and then as he would arrive at his 40^th and slowly to the end. He wondered whether he would not be able to wonder before he left this place. ‘Death’, it scared him. It scared him as it would render him unable to remember this experience and every other experience before this and every other experience he would experience as he walks further in his life.

He looked up at the sky, it was now orange and the sun was on its way to set for the day, and he remembered that his mother must be waiting for him to return. He stood and started walking back wondering what his mother must be feeling, whether she was feeling what he was thinking she was feeling, he wondered….